Roadtrip
The siblings roadtrip was canceled due to lack of interest by everyone. If I get a car this year as planned I’m taking a road trip…even if I have to do it sans siblings.

Hair revamp
I made an appointment with a highly recommended specialist for my hair and her cautions about dyeing hair that is already more fragile than usual due to chemically straightening (relaxing) it every eight weeks discouraged me from putting colour in my hair. I now understand why many of my African friends rock weaves or other hair styles that are protective of their hair. Just before the consultation I started liking the colour of my hair and feeling like it had a lot of depth. My friend told me she feels the same way before she contemplates a cut or colour so maybe it’s just that part of me that is resistant to change that was trying to assert itself.

I went to get my hair relaxed for a wedding a couple of weeks ago and the hair stylist cut some long sideswept bangs for me that I loved when they were freshly styled. Since I’ve washed my hair and returned to my regular “wash and go” routine, I haven’t bothered trying to style my bangs.

I’m mildly obsessed with my hair right now, but Jummy-style obsessed. Really obsessed people throw themselves into new routines or try new treatments; all I’m doing is seeking out products that are better for my hair so that I can keep to my lowkey routine routine without having unhealthy hair. I’m on to something and once I get my hands on some and try it, I’ll report back.

For now my goal is to grow my hair nice and healthy, and minimize the amount of breakage and hair loss I’m experiencing.

Running out of excuses not to run
I’m still learning to run, but I’m stuck in the Run 5 minutes, walk 1 minute vortex, mostly because for the last two weeks I haven’t been out. I’ve been really tired and even when I wake up of my own volition to work out, I close my eyes for a second and I’m up an hour later, scrambling to get ready so I arrive at work on time. This must change.

Eating yogurt
This is what actually triggered this entry…I bought some non-dessert yogurt, but it contained about 2% milk fat, compared to the dessert yogurt’s 3.2%. I was feeling hungry but not starved, so I figured that it was the perfect time to try the slightly lower fat yogurt, the kind that the average healthy person might eat if they weren’t on a diet (where I presume the 0% yogurt would rule the day). I looked at the container to convince myself to try it since it contained only a slightly lower amount of fat when I realized I had purchased 12 cups of zero fat yogurt! (Yes, this would be considered a faux woe.) The horror! I had been told that you can taste the sourness more in the lower fat yogurts and that had kind of kept me from going fat free. I tried it and it was sour, not pudding-like in taste like the dessert yogurt. I won’t reach for it when I’m craving something sweet but I know my body will thank me once I’ve worked my way through the remaining 11 cups.

A trip to Europe? (Or maybe just USA)
Last weekend I went for dinner with a friend and she got me excited about seeing New York City because I’m rewatching Sex and the City. My Fab 5 friends (longtime friends) and I have had an NYC trip tentatively booked for years now, so we need to make it happen or I’ll be headed to NYC for the September long weekend in 2011 all by myself. I can’t wait to start shopping for flights (if affordable…otherwise I’ll drive or take the train) and hotel rooms. I know a couple of people who’ve been to NYC so I’m sure they’ll steer me right.

I’m looking forward to the next 12 months…I want to look back and marvel at all that has taken place in the past year. Without concrete plans for the future I realize that might not happen but I’m ever so hopeful.

My food consumption has been mindless, and I’ve been craving sugar more than ever. I’m not sure why that is: habit, perhaps, and laziness. It’s easier to eat fast food without thinking than to be mindful; it’s easier to ignore what my body needs and eat what my nose likes the smell of, and I’ve been feeling lazy when it comes to food preparation. I ate chicken wings for dinner tonight, but I ordered a side of carrots and celery because I was craving them. It felt good to eat what my body wanted and stop when I was full, meaning that I have leftover chicken wings for tomorrow. I had coffee after dinner, and ordered a slice of lemon poppyseed loaf to eat with it, but after drinking the coffee I realized I didn’t need the cake, so I’m saving it for tomorrow too. Baby steps.

I’ve been working on loving myself as I mentioned, telling myself that I’m beautiful and awesome, just as I am, and it’s working, meaning that I’m believing it…most of the time. Even today with my air-dried and unstyled hair, I was able to look at myself in the elevator mirror at my workplace and send myself a loving and positive message. When I saw an impossibly slim yet quite curvy woman on my way to the restaurant for dinner, I tried not to wish I had her body, but instead admire her body as being perfect for her, and accept that my body, while not yet perfect for me, would be one day. And in the meantime I was going to love it as if it was the body of my dreams. It feels good to flood my body with love (though no one is surprised to hear this!).

In other confessions, my house still looks like I moved in mere months ago: the windows are uncovered, the walls remain bare (I haven’t even hung these up), my craft nook is cluttered, a spare television that a friend gave me is being used as a makeshift end table, I haven’t painted, my spare bedroom looks like a storage room and my thermostat and furnace need to be examined. I received my property tax bills for April to December 2009 and January to December 2010 and all I can say is ouch. Thank God that I didn’t buy a car or I’d be begging my sister for a loan to pay these atrocious bills. I’m not pleased but this is one of the privileges of home ownership, I’m told.

So there you have it, Jummy is still excelling at being her imperfect self.

As expected, I danced like a fool when the music changed to my kind of music.

* * *

I have always enjoyed observing couples, and weddings give me ample opportunity to do that. I like watching interactions between couples in all stages of their relationship, especially because weddings usually bring out the tender side of couples , either from remembering their own special day years ago or anticipating the future. When a slow song like Unchained Melody comes on and I don’t have anyone’s arms to melt into, it kind of sucks but I’m hopeful that that won’t always be my reality and I try not to think of all the things that a 31 year old woman who has been waiting f-o-r-e-v-e-r to fall in love, get married and have kids will think of at weddings.

All of that to say that I had a good time at the wedding. I regret not taking a full length photo of my outfit; hopefully the photographer (who was also quite handsome) did!

Over the years, I have put countless books about diabetes on hold. And invariably, when the books come in I either refuse to pick them up or I pick them up from the library but don’t read them. I don’t even open them once. My reason for not reading them is of course because I don’t want to read about the complications that this terrible disease can cause because that always makes me cry. I am not brave when it comes to confronting diabetes.

Today I came across a book that the library will be acquiring, Diabetes without Drugs, and although I suspect the book is for diabetics who aren’t using insulin, I still want to check it out and read it, even though it will be a hard process. The author is a pharmacist and she thinks that America (and no doubt Canada as well) over-prescribes drugs for ailments that can be cured or managed through natural means (while the focus of this particular book is diabetes, the author thinks drugs are over prescribed in general). My mom is on a number of medications and I have often been curious about whether the effects of one are counteracting the effects of another. I understand it’s a delicate balance and if my mom is taking a medication that raises her blood sugar, chances are that research has been done to ascertain that the effect of the drug outweighs the side-effect of elevated blood sugar…but sometimes I wonder.

I read an article about the author of the book and that led me to an article about things that have been shown to have a negative effect on diabetes, chemicals like bisphenol A, benzene, aspartame and MSG. I don’t drink carbonated drinks often so I think I’m pretty safe from aspartame, but I know some diet foods contain it (not that diet foods are a part of my diet!). I also associate Chinese food (hopefully not erroneously) with MSG, probably because my family’s favourite take-out restaurant offers no MSG upon request. My family really loves Chinese food, but I can’t recall asking specifically for the omission of MSG from my meal.

I’m sure the articles I stumbled across were not meant to cause hysteria, but of course a part of me panicked at the thought of all the absolute junk I’ve consumed over the last 19 years in particular. I’ve always known it wasn’t good for me but now I’m wondering if my choices have begun to have irreversible effects on my future health.

I’m watching the 11:00pm news and guess what was just on the news? Bisphenol A (BPA)! This chemical mimics estrogen, has been linked to some cancers and has been implicated in type 2 diabetes. BPA is found in the lining of pop cans and food containers and it coats many receipts (this last one surprised me!). The study conducted found that 90% of the people tested had levels of BPA in their bodies, with adults aged 40-79 having the lowest levels, children aged 6-11 with the next highest levels and teenagers 12-19 having the highest levels of BPA (not surprising considering how much pop or other drinks in bottles and cans teens consume, generally speaking). An interesting piece of trivia is our city was the first in the world to ban BPA from baby bottles.

Anyway, that last bit was either a lovely coincidences or a sign from God. I’m glad I tuned in and I’m looking forward to actually read Diabetes without Drugs when it comes in!

Edited to add: The local news is now doing a story on traveling for diabetics…I was clearly meant to watch the news tonight!

First off, let me say that I am not one of the women she’s telling to accept their fat if they eat well, exercise and are still not conforming to what “society” considers normal. This is because I am a compulsive overeater when it comes to sweets. I eat three normal, relatively balanced meals (I need more veggies though) most days, but when sugary sweets are added to the mix, I know I am not in control. I don’t want any of you to think I watched the videos and thought I had an excuse to stop trying to control my overeating and just accept myself as I am. I have to continue introducing healthy habits into my life, and in addition to exercise this includes not bingeing on sugary treats. If, after a few years of mindfully eating and regularly exercising, after annual checkups that reveal that all my medical blood tests continue to be better than those of previous years (which were always “normal”), I am still “fat”, then I can embrace that aspect of the video. Does that make sense? It’s so important to make that distinction.

What I love about the videos is they don’t glorify being fat (overweight, obese). The message is: eat well, eat things you like too, exercise, and if you are still fat, who cares?!! Another stronger message is to society who looks down on people who are fat and who thinks less of them or attributes certain traits to them because they are fat. Are some fat people lazy? Absolutely! Are some skinny people lazy? Of course! Are some fat people slobs? Sure thing! So are skinny people.

The videos focus on the intrinsic value of humans, regardless of their shape or size. It tells those of us who have put certain aspects of their life on hold because they are fat (Um, not that I can relate) that I they have to stop using that as an excuse (to my darling friends who have told me this over and over again, as recently as a few nights ago, don’t think I don’t remember!). People who live on a steady diet of junkfood and ’sedentaryness’ are not excused: it is not ok to complain about being fat if you’re not healthy or trying to adopt healthy habits (though really, the message is stop complaining and start living!).

My favourite quotes from the two videos:

“Don’t use being fat as an excuse…’That guy would never ask me out; I’m fat’…as if that was the only thing that could possibly be wrong with me. How about ‘I’m late all the time’. How about ‘I’m mean to people’? I’m a bitch! I’ve got this great big automatic built-in excuse. I never have to work on any other aspect of my personality. The only thing that anyone could possibly have a problem with is the fact that I’m fat. And I’m also not giving people the benefit of the doubt. Maybe this guy is not a weight bigot. Maybe he just doesn’t talk to me because I look so zoned out all the time. Maybe he hates the band whose tshirt I’m wearing. Maybe he just doesn’t have anything interesting to say. I make this guy’s failure to fall in love with me the fault of my fat. It’s silly; a waste of so much time.”

This was just the slap in the face that I needed. I know deep down that there are many aspects of my personality that could be turnoffs to guys, but I’ve always felt like my excess weight was the biggest issue. But, I’ve also told my dearest friends that if I manage to lose the weight and am still single, that’ll prove to me that it’s my attitude that needs to be adjusted.

“Fat hate is one of the only forms of prejudice where the people who are subjected to it feel like they are getting exactly what they deserve.”

So true! I think a lot of my friends are learning more and more how deep-rooted my issues with my weight and my worthiness are and that above quote says it all. I expect to be rejected (by men) because of my size. When it happens I’m hurt but deep down I feel like I deserve it.

“You deserve to be treated with respect and dignity. You deserve to be happy.”

I am done with feeling like I’m less worthy because of the extra pounds. I am determined to “fake it until I make it” when it comes to believing that I’m a beautiful woman right this instant, not 80 pounds (less) from now. Self confidence is not conceit: it’s believing in your worth as a human being and projecting that. It’s dressing your body the best way you know how, right now. It’s wearing make up, playing up the attributes you love, while allowing the parts you’re not as crazy about to play second fiddle. But those parts that you’re not crazy about? You still have to love them, because they are part of what makes you, you. Work on them, but also accept that they may be here to stay.

I wore a skirt that was above the knee to work a couple of days ago and I felt so self conscious. When I tried it on at the store the day before, I knew it was shorter than what I normally wear, but I thought it looked good. I have always hated the back of my knees because of the hunk of lower thigh that meets at the knee that I thought looked ugly, but I actually do have nice legs, hunk included, so I decided to stop hiding. I was worried that some people might see me in the skirt and wonder why someone of my size was wearing something that short (much like I think when I see someone wearing something that is way too tight for them…in my opinion), but that’s what self confidence is about: if you think you look good and you find something that fits, wear it! Who cares what people think! For all I know most were wondering how I left the house with my hair looking like an uncombed mass on my head!

Anyway, this is more than enough chatter on this issue of fat. This is such a long journey; I hope I have the stamina to go the distance.

• We have the same recurring hair in that space between our chin and neck that we must pluck (though hers is grey)
• When we’re cross, we give the same look
• We have the same chin area
• We are boisterous, impulsive and playful
• We both not-so-secretly believe that there is only one way to do things

I am my father’s child:

• I have his nose, and his eyebrows
• We both wear glasses (though he is far-sighted while I’m near-sighted)
• We like to keep our paperwork…until it threatens to drown us
• We are big readers
• We like to do research

I hope I inherit my mother’s ability to be hospitable like none other, her self-sacrificing nature and her unending stores of energy. I hope I can one day boast that I am as willing as my dad is to see the good in people, to be so confident in who I am that I can hear people saying things that are lies about me and quietly defend myself, once, then walk away. I hope I can one day be as wise as he is.

It is my dad’s 60th birthday today, and we’re throwing a casual, open-house type bash for him, at my parents’ place, in one short week. The invitations went out yesterday, by email, and because of the love that so many people have for my parents, I know it will be rousing success. In fact, I may need a day off to recuperate from it. Happy Birthday to my dad, who would be horrified to learn that I have yet again posted something about him on my blog.

Christmas 2009

Week 1: 1 minute run, 2 minutes walk; repeat 6 times
Week 2: 2 minute run, 1 minute walk; repeat 6 times
Week 3: 3 minute run, 1 minute walk; repeat 5 times
Week 4: 4 minute run, 1 minute walk; repeat 4 times
Week 5: 5 minute run, 1 minute walk; repeat 3 times
Week 6: 6 minute run, 1 minute walk*
Week 7: 7 minute run, 1 minute walk*
Week 8: 8 minute run, 1 minute walk*
Week 9: 9 minute run, 1 minute walk*
Week 10: 10 minute run, 1 minute walk*

*I’ll have to fill in the number of reps later as I can’t recall how it goes.

(Also, I think the program does the walk first, then the run part but I usually walk for a minute or two before starting to run…I have to psych myself up!)

The shocking part is as I enter my fourth week, I have managed to go out three times a week and do the above…in the morning.

I am not a morning person (!!) but I have woken up before work twice a week and done this run (my third day is a Sunday so I have been able to get up later, but still earlier than my usual weekend wake up time). I’m amazed by this, but almost as amazed as I am by the fact that I have been able to progress each week, adding a minute to the running part and making it work. It really is a testament to the resiliency of the human body and its ability to adapt.

Remember I mentioned joining a Learn to Run program? The plan was to join one being offered by a local running club, but the session at that location was cancelled. I (and my crazy colleague) went to another location to try out the first session last week and I wasn’t impressed (though it’s not the running club’s fault): it is offered after work, the location is distant from my workplace, I didn’t enjoy taking the bus in my workout gear, sweaty and out of breath and, it turns out I prefer working out in the mornings, shockingly enough, because I really look forward to the refreshing shower and it’s just a good way to start the day. For those reasons I decided not to join, but to stick with my own program.

I had a concern after the session I did with the group that perhaps I was moving too slowly because I was near the back of the pack. My crazy colleague tried to tell me I was crazy but I would not listen. The instructor was able to mostly convince me that speed does not matter, it’s not a competition, it’s a personal thing and as long as I’m running when I’m supposed to be, and walking when I’m supposed to be, I’m doing just fine.

What I love too, is although I’d love to lose weight with this new habit, it’s not the goal. My mindset is “healthy people exercise regularly, so I’m doing this because I want to remain healthy”. It’s a refreshing way of looking at things and when I combine that with what I’ve learned from reading Women Food and God, I feel like I’m on the right track, even though I ate skittles nearly every day last week. It’s a process.

So, I’m off to begin day 1 of a four minute run, followed by a minute of walking. I’m worried that I won’t be able to do it but you know what? I’m going to try.

Develop a healthy relationship with food from a place of love rather than of hatred (of yourself or your body).
To do this I will have to silence The Voice, that part of me that spouts negative things like You will always be single as long as you remain fat, and makes a correlation between my physical appearance and my value as a human being. If someone came up to me and said that because they are 100lbs overweight they think they’re less worthy than a slimmer person of having what they desire in life, I’d stare at them, aghast. I’m the weirdest person: I love myself, honest, but I do fall for the false truth of The Voice’s messages, especially when I look around and it seem like now that most of my friends are coupled up, it’s the larger ones who are still single.

I went for coffee with a friend almost two weeks ago and as we sat under a tree in the parking lot, she shared that as silly as it may seem, writing positive messages for myself and tucking them in places only I would see might be a good way to pump myself up. Even if I read “You’re a beautiful woman, worthy of finding love and living the future you want” and I snicker, with time I will believe it. I haven’t done it yet but I imagine shutting up The Voice, and replacing its messages around me with positive ones will go a long way to a more positive Jummy (well, a more body-positive Jummy, because I think I’m a fairly positive person).

Awareness and compulsion cannot coexist, since the latter depends on obliteration of the former.
That is a direct quote from the book (page 156) and it’s true. When I eat sweets (my vice), it is a compulsion. When I recognize that I am eating compulsively, I can’t go back and pretend that I’m not aware of that. It doesn’t mean that I stop every time I realize that I’m just eating skittles without thinking, but even the decision to keep eating is a more conscious one. And that’s important.

I am a Permitter.
The book uses the terminology of Restrictors and Permitters, and you can probably guess from the names what each does with regard to food. As a Permitter, I don’t believe in putting limitations on what I can consume. I’m aware of the hazards of eating too much sugar or fat, but I dislike the idea of limiting myself calorically or in any other way (I don’t like restrictions generally speaking). Apparently Permitters use food to leave their bodies and not be present, so as a result they are not good at talking in terms of fullness or hunger. So when I feel myself slipping into compulsive eating, I’m supposed to ask myself if I’m actually hungry. I think the questioning brings you back into the moment and makes it harder to be mindless and unaware of your body’s feelings of hunger or not as the case may be.

Learning about hunger.
If you have a healthy relationship with food, you generally don’t eat when you’re not hungry, and you certainly stop eating when you’re full. This doesn’t mean that you don’t ever overeat, especially when you’re eating something you love, but most of the time, you follow those simple rules. I’m not like that: I am learning to ask myself if I’m satisfied while eating, and most of the time I’ve discovered that it takes less for me to feel satisfied in my stomach than I thought it would. For example, I’ve always bought two slices of thin crust pizza for lunch because two slices cost $5.80 versus one slice at $3.15. After eating one slice, I’m always anticipating the second so I eat it. However sometimes, as I discovered when I tried it last week, one slice is enough. In fact, unless I haven’t had breakfast, one slice of pizza leaves me feeling satisfied, but even getting used to feeling satisfied versus “stuffed” is a work in progress. When your stomach is distended, you probably overdid it, and I realize now that I overdo it regularly.

When I feel a craving (versus hunger) for food, I feel it in the base of my throat. It’s a feeling I’ve come to recognize these past couple of weeks and maybe you’ve felt it too. It’s a desire for something, but if it’s not in my stomach, it’s not true hunger. This feeling in my throat can feel far more severe than a growling stomach, so I really have to work on finding out why I’m feeling that craving and seeing if there’s something besides food that will ease the feeling in my throat.

If you made it this far, thanks for reading. I was really getting this info down so that I’d have it to look back on in the future. I think anyone can benefit from the seven eating guidelines so if nothing else, I’d encourage you to check them out.

Not surprisingly I want some fun adventures this year, and I want to do things I haven’t gotten around to doing. Things like:

A road trip where I’m the main driver
The furthest away I’ve driven is two hours or about 200 km away but my youngest brother mentioned going to the USA for shopping before September, so I suggested we make it a sibling thing and rent a car. I’ll never say no to outlet shopping so I’m looking forward to this.

Getting a hair cut and colour
I’ve gotten trims and very simple hair cuts before but this time I want a real cut, something sassy. I’ve never coloured my hair so that’ll be something. The cut I’m thinking of (which one of my friends was sporting when I ran into her this past weekend, funny enough) requires me to grow my hair a bit more so I’ll colour first.

Learning to run
So two years ago, I did a walk/run to raise money for a cause dear to my heart. My time was slower than I hoped, and I had grossly underestimated how far five kilometres is by foot. I haven’t run since.

But a crazy colleague has convinced me that a learn to run program is what we need in our lives and she simultaneously convinced me that it won’t kill us (me). We start in two weeks.

I decided to go out and try what we’ll be doing the first week: run for one minute, walk for two minutes, repeat a trillion (or maybe 6-8) times. The good news is I managed to run for a minute without stopping (yes, I am that out of shape); the bad news is I could only do four sets before I switched to walking alone. The worst news is today, the day after, I feel like I tried a new form of exercise that showed me who’s boss; either that or I was doing squats in my sleep. I feel it in my (fl)abs too.

Eating yogurt
I’m a very picky eater. I have never knowingly ingested salad dressing, dips, cottage cheese, sour cream and yogurt. My crazy colleague (yeah, the same one) made me try a dessert yogurt (120 calories, 3.5% milk fat) and it was pretty good! I wonder if I can try a non-dessert yogurt without gagging; I’ve bought some and I’ll let you know how that goes.

I want to end this with a challenge: can you think of something that you don’t think I’ve done that I really should do? All reasonable suggestions will be considered, and by “reasonable” I mean any suggestion that won’t bankrupt or embarrass me. I’m not looking for thrills so much as things that will shake my life up a bit and provide me with great memories.

Updated to add:

A trip to Europe in 2011 or 2012
This is another sibling plan. I don’t know where we’ll go, but England (well, London more than anything), France or Italy are sounding good so far.

I did some light housecleaning in an attempt to make my house look less like a junkheap. I know I have mentioned my packrat/clutterbug ways before. My clutter is so bad that twice now I have refused to answer the doorbell for fear that I’d have someone at my door that might actually expect to be let into my house, which would lead to them seeing my house for the natural disaster it is and cause them to immediately judge me. I wouldn’t blame them if they did though: I’m really a mess.

The first doorbell ring I ignored was Allison, but to be fair it was more than the state of my house that kept me from answering the door: I had just gotten home from our camping trip and I was boiling hot so I had removed all my clothing except my knickers and hiked my skirt up under my armpits (I’m not the only one who does this am I? Also: do not try to create a mental image). Needless to say, I was not dressed for company.

Allison left lovely flowers at my door. Today I got nothing.

My entries have been so uninspired and lacklustre. I have no excuses except that they reflect my rather lacklustre life. I make my life what it is so I can only say it’s my own lethargy that is to blame.

When I was exercising more regularly, I came up with rewards for reaching certain milestones, things like getting my eyebrows threaded (like waxing only better?), getting fitted for contact lenses so that they really are as good as wearing glasses, getting a pedicure, but I’ve decided that I deserve these rewards now. My eyebrows constantly make me want to weep and although I love my glasses, I also like how I look without them, and on sunny days I’d like to be able to wear sunglasses and be able to see (I don’t have prescription sunglasses, y’see). I also have a teeth whitening kit I need to try out too. My plan tomorrow is to make appointments to take care of my eyes and eyebrows.

I’ll be starting a Learn to Run program with my colleague in late July. It’s a 10-week program that’ll bring us right to the end of September, when I may or may not be going on a trip (more info when things are confirmed). My hope is that if I keep this up I’ll be able to shed some pounds and this may have the effect of making me want to do my workout dvds more regularly for strength training purposes (guess who’s fallen off the workout wagon again?). I haven’t run in a very long time so I’m a bit afraid but it’s a learn to run program so I should be ok.

I went for dinner with a friend a couple of days ago. She knows what it’s like to carry some extra weight so we can talk up a storm on weight-related issues. The question I asked her is how would it feel not to have the weight thing always rattling around in your head, especially when potential relationships are concerned. For me, when I’m doing the online dating thing, I feel it’s my absolute duty to communicate the fact that I’m plus-sized to any potential dates, and I probably go overboard in this. Until I meet the guy in person (and even after I meet him), I’m all worked up about how he will react to my weight—not to my annoying laugh or lack of coherence when talking—but to my size. The obsession is annoying, even to me. My friend said I’d probably obsess about something else if it wasn’t the weight and she’s probably right, but still, I wonder.

I’m trying to figure out what I can do to be a little patriotic today. Canada is a wonderful country and it deserves to be celebrated, even though we’re being hit with a tax increase on some things, effective today. Boo on the HST!