I know it’s a bad idea to write about work on a public blog but I have to confess that I am not always focused when I’m there (big surprise, right?). I often daydream about some goals I have yet to achieve, usually not work-related goals, and it is when I’m at work that my fingers itch to write down plans, consider scenarios and take baby steps in the direction of my dreams (this urge vanishes the moment I turn the key in my front door though).

My working personality is one that I don’t like at all: I get comfortable and I plod along, doing the same thing. I lack confidence in myself and make no attempts to make myself shine, even though I see others around me doing it and getting recognition for it. They’re no smarter than I am; they just know how to play up their strengths and minimize their weaknesses. My attention to detail is one of my greatest strengths but you’d never know it. I’m a very helpful person and often put aside my own work to help others and lose track of the time, while they seem to know when to be helpful and when to step back, and how to avoid staying late at work catching up. My welcoming nature makes my office one of the more popular ones for people who want to talk to someone who is interested and who will become engaged in the conversation, but at the end of a 15 or 20 minute conversation, I’m left with nothing more than a closer bond to a colleague (which I love) and a backlog of work to do (which I of course detest).

When I come up with good ideas that are put into place and prove effective, I don’t make a record of it. I don’t devise ways of measuring the success of my initiatives so that these can be used to bolster my salary during my appraisals (not that I have ever requested a salary boost, mind you!). I do so many things half way, not taking full advantage of opportunities, and definitely leaving a lot on the table.

Far too often I simply do what I’m told and let others draw out the path of my career. Much like I am when it comes to things where I feel I’m not an expert, I let someone else steer my career. Others use me as a resource to help them get where they are going (and there’s nothing wrong with that), but I don’t end up doing the same. And as I see others moving ahead, I realize that I have to step up my game and make sure I have something to show for my time at this place, especially as my five-year anniversary approaches.

In the last year there have been some changes to my position, and these need to be fully digested and recorded, especially some unclear elements. Why haven’t I done it yet??? Can you believe that I haven’t updated my resume in four years? Of course you can; my reputation for procrastination is hardly a secret. I don’t even know where the last resume I updated back in 2006 is, while some people I know keep their resume so up-to-date that they would be able to print off a copy and hand it to a potential employer within a minute.

This entry was supposed to go in a completely different direction: I wanted to talk about how I need structure and try to get structure in many areas of my life, including my job, yet I have trouble maintaining it; I guess I’ll save that for another entry.

Where do you see your career going? Are you in the career or job you intend to still be in in the next five years?

Filed under: Job by jummy