Why I should be nominated for What Not To Wear
February 12, 2009
The following facts comprise my self nomination for What Not To Wear: no need to film me secretly, boasting about how I like my personal style because I don’t, no need to anticipate tears of anguish as my entire wardrobe is trashed and replaced with $5,000 of new clothing because that would be divine, and no need to anticipate tears of sorrow on the loss of my hair (just give me a style I can do myself that doesn’t scream “I give up. Give me a gallon of icecream and a spoon!”).
- I did not buy winter boots this season: I am wearing my dad’s boots. My father does not wear feminine boots. The boots are about 3/4 of a size to a full size too big for me. You may call me JummyMan
- I have been wearing my hair pulled off my face for the past while. It’s not even combed most days. Very straggly.
- My clothing hugs my lumps. I am very lumpy.
- I have not worn a lick of makeup, save lipgloss, since December 31, 2008. I have not even worn mascara, eyeliner or eye shadow.
- My blue sweater that I love so is pilled (fuzzy) and looks dirty, even fresh from the laundry.
- My black pants that are such a lovely weight are an inch too short. I wore them to work a couple of days ago. I swear my ankles felt the draft.
- My indoor shoes look mannish (they’re for women, I swear).
(Don’t forget to please check out Emma’s site and buy something from the site if you feel led to do so (please feel led!). The money (every last penny!) will be going to a very good cause.)
Do you habitually wear insulated men’s knee-high rubber boots to work? Are you perpetually clad in plaid? Do you often show up to work wearing more horse hair (Chestnut Gelding Thoroughbred hair, to be specific) than a typical pony?
Do you own jeans that are worn through at the thighs and yet, you keep wearing them? Does your winter coat (the one mentioned above with all the horse hair) have a bum flap so you can sit comfortably in a saddle?
THEN YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO SAY YOU BELONG ON WHAT NOT TO WEAR.
(I must say that I’ve never seen anything exceptionally unfashionable in your wardrobe. If you were a plaid jacket lover, I would be able to say “Dude, that looks horrible”, but other than that? I always think your clothing is quite chic. Or at least, nice.)
You’ve looked nice in every photo I’ve seen of you. But if YOU aren’t happy with your style – change it! :) I don’t think the things you listed are necessarily bad things, but if you do then you might have fun trying something new! Do you have good thrift shops near you where you can try out new fashions without spending much money?
I essentially never buy new clothes. I’m going to have to buy new jeans soon, though, because mine are torn and I’m not supposed to be wearing torn jeans at the office.
Hm, I think that means I’m qualified for it, too…
Quick- get Stacy and Clinton here!
:-)
I’ve always wanted to be nominated but none of my friends will agree that I am worthy of a make over. It’s like they are lying to me!
I don’t think they’ve ever done a show in Canada. Also, I don’t think you would qualify. There is no way they would take you. Have you seen some of the clothes people who get picked wear? I think you would have to switch to all neon clothing to qualify.
Sidenote: I love Stacy’s clothes so much. She has the best style!
Maybe not What I want to wear but how to look good naked? Although, I don’t think you’d qualify for that either because it doesn’t sound like (and for good reason) you hate your body.
It would be totally nice to have someone help you pick out the clothes that look totally hot on you for free wouldn’t it?